401: PurposeParents

I have been thinking about the role that parents play in a child's PurposeQuest, even when those children are mature and out of the house.  This week,  I want to focus on three parents in the Old Testament, make some comments on how they were as PurposeParents and then give them a grade.  See if you agree with my evaluation.

1.    Abraham – Abraham was distracted at times by his attachment to Ishmael, whom he fathered to Hagar while he was waiting for God’s promised son. Abraham was willing to sacrifice his son at God’s command, which shows that he certainly put God before his son and had his priorities correct. To his credit, Abraham got involved in finding Isaac a wife, but Isaac wasn’t a purpose-driven man. 

Isaac never accomplished much of anything and we will see that he was a poor father.  That leads me to say that Abraham failed to provide adequate direction for Isaac, whose only accomplishment seems to have been unstopping some of his father’s wells that the locals had filled in.  Isaac obviously knew about the promises that God made to Abraham, but did little to carry them out.  For all that, I give Abraham a C as a PurposeParent.

2.    Isaac - Isaac was a man of many weaknesses.  His wife Rebekah regularly had to intervene in the family’s affairs when Isaac didn’t seem to pay attention.  No one will ever convince me that Isaac didn’t know it was Jacob standing before him when Jacob tricked Isaac into giving him the blessing that belonged to the eldest. “Jacob went close to his father Isaac, who touched him and said, "The voice is the voice of Jacob, but the hands are the hands of Esau." He did not recognize him, for his hands were hairy like those of his brother Esau; so he blessed him. "Are you really my son Esau?" he asked (Genesis 27:22-24).  Isaac did not want to confront Jacob or to anger his wife. 

Jacob never mentioned his father and, in part due to Isaac’s poor parenting model, Jacob’s family was a mess. I give Isaac an F as a PurposeParent

3.    Jacob – What can we say about a man who played favorites, didn’t confront the obvious animosity between his sons, fathered sons to four different women and paid more attention to his business than to his offspring?  We would say that he was a bad parent, and that’s what Jacob was.  I give Jacob a D as a parent (at least he had the sense to favor Joseph over the rest, although the way he showed it caused Joseph tremendous problems).

I want to go one step further with Jacob, however.  I would give Jacob an A as a grandfather.  Read Genesis 48:1-22 and see how Jacob handled the blessing of Joseph’s sons.  He got it right!  He didn’t pay attention to the grandsons' age, but rather to God's purpose for their lives.  He refused to follow what Joseph wanted him to do and instead released each grandchild to his divine destiny. 

PurposeParent Lessons:

• It's never too late to instill purpose in your children or grandchildren.
• There are no perfect parents, only a perfect God.
• God was known as the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, so He identifies with the weak and imperfect. There is hope for you and me!
• God has a purpose for each child. 

As a parent (or future parent), meditate on and discuss the parenting skills of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob as they relate to your child’s purpose.  What can you learn about what not to do with your children?  What can you learn that will make you more effective?  Can you think of other parental models to consider from the Bible?  How about Mary, Moses’ parents, Hannah, Jesse or David?  What can you learn from them that will make your children more in tune with their purpose and destiny?  Have a great week!

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REVELATION: I need your help. I urgently want to publish my next book, this time a devotional from the book of Revelation. I wrote about this project in my blog last week and encourage you to read what I wrote there. In that post, I explain my urgency in wanting to get it out for people to read. Then please consider if the Lord wants you to help me to restore an important book of the Bible that has been obscured by so many weird interpretations.  If you have any questions about the project, please don't hesitate to contact me.

THE SOPHIA FUND UPDATE:  Last week, $150 came in for The Fund.  As I promised, every penny you send is going to feed the poor in Zimbabwe and Kenya. Nothing goes to overhead or administration.  Won't you consider helping orphans and widows today?  You can read about my rationale for The Fund here (named after my late mother) that will help feed widows and orphans in Kenya and Zimbabwe. 

Please consider a contribution of at least $5 toward the fund and hopefully more.  You can use the "Chipin" widget on the Monday Memo site to contribute, or go directly to my website to contribute there through PayPal, or send a tax-deductible check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 91099, Pittsburgh, PA  15221.  Make sure you let me know it is for The Sophia Fund. Don't delay; give today and make a difference in the world.

Comments

[Gio Pera]

Hi,

This post was awesome. Not sure I think Isaac was such a failure, but I've never consciously considered studying the parents to learn the lessons. That for me was a huge eye-opener. Keep these coming

[Mark Wood]

John-
This post reminded me of something else I have heard you discuss in the past, regarding our role as Purpose Parents. That often (for some reason?) as parents we don't always recognize our children's strengths and purpose. And for that reason we must look to others (teachers,friends,coaches) who can provide them and us insight and counsel to what our children's purpose might be. Equipped with that knowledge, I also recall you said, as parents our role should then be to support (prayer, encouragement) our children as they pursue that purpose in their lives. Maybe you can discuss this further in one of your Monday memos?

[Noah]

You know, when I read the Bible, I find it difficult to enquire beyond what is given. Your exercise this week is making me wonder at many other guys who are made to look glorious but in fact may leave a lot to be desired. Yes David is a case in point, but I would want to mark his dad Jesse, who forgot about him when a King was sought. Maybe one could find holes in Boaz's character, or jump back to their ancestor Perez! I know we have to draw a line somewhere in our extrapolations but these studies could be quite contentious.

[John]

Good point, but I don't the Bible makes them look glorious. I think we make them look glorious by looking past their humanity. I choose to see their weaknesses as providing hope in my situation. If God used them, He can use me!

Thanks

John

[Dale Congelliere]

I just got off the phone with my son who gave me the "credit" for making him a pushy person; you see he just got a job at a local restaurant during the summer at school, after he visited it no less than five times and called the GM no less than five times. I told him however that it wasn't me that made him bold, that was God's doing, I just gave him confidence that he had the gifting. Giving our children the confidence in what they can do may just be all they need to succeed.
I enjoy your MM, thanks.
A PP

[Ennie]

Good stuff- I like this in- depth look at people in the bible. I have always had a liking to the story of Esther and how everyone goes on about how good her fortunes turned out. Not many have talked of the husband she got, (let alone parent,I assume he had children) one who threw his first wife out because she refused to come and join his party.... more of these welcome! I want to intentionally be a Purposeparent.