The Monday Memo from John Stanko

754 - Bring Others with You

This week I want to wrap up our purpose profile on Joshua as we look at a story during which Joshua taught others to have the same kind of success he had. Isn't it time that you also encouraged others to step out and fulfill their purpose? Leadership is not something you do to people, but something you do with people, and Joshua embodied that principle in the story we are going to read. Let's get started.

A LEARNING LESSON

Last week we read how the Lord had stopped the sun so Joshua could defeat his enemies. In the process, Joshua had captured five kings, trapping them in a cave where they had gone to hide. The Lord had granted Joshua great success, but then Joshua wanted to use his success as a learning lesson for those who were fighting with him. Here is what he did:

Joshua said, "Open the mouth of the cave and bring those five kings out to me." So they brought the five kings out of the cave—the kings of Jerusalem, Hebron, Jarmuth, Lachish and Eglon. When they had brought these kings to Joshua, he summoned all the men of Israel and said to the army commanders who had come with him, "Come here and put your feet on the necks of these kings." So they came forward and placed their feet on their necks. Joshua said to them, "Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Be strong and courageous. This is what the Lord will do to all the enemies you are going to fight." Then Joshua struck and killed the kings and hung them on five trees, and they were left hanging on the trees until evening (Joshua 10:22-26).

Joshua was not content to be victorious. He knew that many battles were ahead and he wanted those with him to be prepared to do great things. Joshua was not content to win; he wanted to teach others to win as well.

SHARING YOUR WEALTH

If you are not careful, you quest for purpose can be a selfish endeavor. It can degenerate into what you can do and how you can be fulfilled. That's not all bad, yet you must be mindful that you are going through and accomplishing what you are so you can share your wealth with others. Your wealth isn't necessarily money, but rather the experience and lessons you learn along the way, lessons that can help others in their own quest for purpose and meaningfulness. 

How can you share the wealth, so to speak? How can you teach others how to put their feet on their enemy's neck?  You can realize that you have something to share with others and stop devaluing who you are, what you do and where you are. When you realize how valuable your experience is, you can find opportunities to teach, write, broadcast, mentor or coach. You can look for opportunities to share what you have now, trusting that you will not lose anything when you do. Instead, God will give you more, whatever the "more" is that you need to finish your work and fulfill your purpose.

Since 1991, I have looked for ways not only to find my purpose, but also to equip others to find theirs. I have done that through teaching many seminars. I wrote my first book in 1995, and founded PurposeQuest, my company, in 1998. I started my website in 1999, and from the beginning it has been devoted to publishing free material that would help others find purpose. All the while, I kept writing books, and I have authored 27 as of this Memo.

I have also started the My PurposeQuest online television show and started five different radio shows with about 250 episodes devoted to purpose that gave others a chance to share their purpose stories. I have traveled the world to talk to anyone who wanted to listen to me speak about purpose. Those travels have taken me to 42 nations. It's been a fantastic ride, and I trust it's not over. As soon as I have received an insight or new perspective on purpose or productivity, I have found a way to share my wealth with others, teaching them some new way to put their foot on the neck of their enemies, such as fear, unbelief, and doubt.

When you do something good and meaningful this week, stop to think who you can include in the process and how you can do it. When you are about to step on your enemy's neck, bring someone along to enjoy it with you and then see how you can help them do something purposeful. When you do, you won't just have a great week but also a meaningful life. 

     Feel free to post your comment to this Memo on the site where it is located.

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NEW BOOKS: My two latest books are Unlocking the Power of Your Productivity and Unlocking the Power of You and are available in paper or Kindle formats through Amazon.

INTERNET VIDEO: Your PurposeQuest is a show that I do on a monthly basis with guests who tell their purpose stories. You can view my shows on my Vimeo channel.

CHURCH MESSAGE: I spoke in my local church last week and the title of my message was "What's In Your Heart?" You can watch or listen to it through the church's website.

RADIO AND OTHER MESSAGES: Many of my radio shows and my spoken messages are in the archives of my personal website. Feel free to browse there and find something of interest to you as you seek your purpose.

707: An Encounter With the Lord

I had an encounter with God one month ago that I thought I would share with you. Before I do, let me once again say that I cannot do what I am about to tell you if you don't stand with me financially to help me do what God has called me to do. The testimony this week from Kenya is another indicator that the work being done through PurposeQuest is important and making a difference. You can give through my website or by sending a check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh, PA 15221-0882. But now, let me tell you about my encounter.

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I recently finished teaching a Saturday morning undergraduate class on the Book of Psalms. It was the next to the last class and I opened my book bag only to realize that I had left one of my textbooks at home on my desk - or so I thought (I later found it tucked in the bottom of the bag). Then I had an idea. There is a seminary library right above me and I wondered if my missing text was in the library's collection. I looked it up in the computer book catalog and, sure enough, the book was there! I walked upstairs to find it and noticed there were four or five shelves of commentaries on the Psalms.

It was then that I think I heard the voice of God, or at least had this thought: "I want you to study the psalms and be as familiar with them as you are with Proverbs." I was deeply impacted by what I think I heard and stayed there among the book shelves taking it all in.

I walked downstairs and told my class what had just happened. After class I downloaded several commentaries about the psalms. Since that Saturday morning, I have started my day by writing my daily devotional that this year is interestingly enough focused on the psalms. After I write, I am working my way through one of the textbooks, taking careful notes of what I learn and see. Oftentimes I read through my textbooks too quickly without taking the time to read all the biblical references. This time I am taking my time.

My most interesting insight so far is that the Book of Psalms and the Book of Revelation have a similar theme, which is that the righteous must suffer but God is still on the throne. In reality, I have identified 34 thematic consistencies between those two books. Here are a few of them:

1. The righteous will suffer.
2. The righteous cry out to God in prayer for help and vindication.
3. Victory of God's people is assured.
4. Both books focus on a king and His people.
5. Evil is portrayed in both books on a grand scale.
6. The wicked are confident and seem to have the upper hand.

I could list more but that's not the point of this post. The point is that I had to accept in faith that God had spoken to me, that He had directed my thoughts. Then I had to tell others. After that I had to take steps to insure that I would follow through. I had to write down "psalms" on my daily to-do list, and do it every day. I am keeping notes of what I see and learn and now I am sharing some of that with you.

What do you think God is saying to you? Do you really believe that He can guide your thoughts or are you fearful that someone, perhaps the devil, is trying to play a trick on you? Do you diligently follow through on your impressions? All those things and more and important if you are going to be a person of purpose or simply obedient to the Lord on a daily basis.

I am not sure what I will do with what I am learning, but right now that's not the point. The point is that I believe God has directed me and I must follow through. If He directed me to those library shelves, He can lead me beyond them to the landing place for my work. Until He does, I plan on being in the book of Psalms for quite some time. Thanks for reading and have a blessed week.

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KENYA UPDATE: I just posted an exciting update and testimony from Kenya. Please take the time to read it and then donate generously to our work there. You can give through my website or by sending a tax-deductible check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh, PA 15221-0882. 

LEADERSHIP BREAKFAST: I am speaking at the last Duquesne University Leadership Breakfast this Tuesday, May 12 from 7:30 to 10:00 AM. My topic is Unlocking the Power of Your Creative Edge: Staying Inspired!. You can find more information or register at the University website.

PURPOSE SEMINAR: I am hosting my next free purpose seminar on Saturday, May 16 from noon to 4:30 PM on the North Side at Allegheny Center Alliance Church. You do need to register even though it's free, so please email me to let me know you are coming.

#STANKOISMS: My latest book, #stankoisms: Wisdom for the Twitter Age is now available in paper or ebook format.

ANOTHER BOOK: I released another book this past week for which I served as the editor as well as being a contributing author. Leadership Essentials is now available in Kindle or paper format.

ONE MORE BOOK: I am releasing another book this Tuesday at my creativity workshop entitled Unlocking the Power of Your Creativity. You can purchase it now in paper or ebook format.

My Latest Ministry Update

Since 1991, I have worked to provide resources to help you and people all over the world like you to find and fulfill your God-given purpose. Here are some of the ways you can benefit from and get in touch with those resources in the days to come:

KENYA UPDATE: I posted the latest update from my work in Kenya on my blog. You can read about the work we are doing with orphans there, and you can read through a history of our work by viewing all my Kenya entries here. Once you have read, I ask that you donate generously to help us continue the work. You can do this through my website using PayPal or by sending a tax-deductible check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh, PA 15221-0882.

KENYA COLLECTIONS:  I collect items of need for Kenya year-round and ship them over once a year to found libraries and equip schools. Items collected include shoes (men's, women's, kid's, dress, casual, new and used), books (fiction and non-fiction, non-textbooks, new or used), used but in-working-order laptops, educational supplies, undergarments for children, musical instruments, and art supplies. Contact me for pickup or drop items off at Allegheny Center Alliance Church on the North Side of Pittsburgh.

KENYA TRIP: The deadline for applications for the 2015 Kenya trip is Sunday, September 28. The final information meeting will be held for those interested in going on that day as well, at 12:30 PM on the North Side of Pittsburgh. Let me know if you will be attending. You can read about past trips on my travel blog.

COMING TO DALLAS TEXAS: I will be conducting a purpose seminar in Dallas on Saturday, September 20 from 10 to 12:30 at 8115 Preston Road in Dallas (this is a board room in an office complex and not a church or nonprofit organization). I am sponsoring this myself with the help of my friend, John Mogk, and the admission is free, but you do need to register! I need to hear that you are coming no later than Thursday, September 18 at 5 PM. Just send me an email and I will send you a confirmation!

PITTSBURGH SEMINAR: I will be hosting a purpose seminar here in Pittsburgh on Saturday, October 4 from noon to 4:30. Space is limited to 40 people but admission is free! Once again, I ask that you send me an email to let me know you will be there. My email address is [email protected]. The sessions are held in the Children's MInistry facility at Allegheny Center Alliance Church.

CREATIVITY GROUP: Last year I began a once-a-month meeting of creative people who get together for encouragement, teaching, and feedback on their work. The group is called G1 (short for Genesis 1) since we are created in the image of the Creator. The upcoming meetings are September 27, October 25 and November 22 (all Saturdays) from 1PM to 3PM in Pittsburgh on the North Side. Again, just let me know you are coming. The group has created a Facebook page for you to access.

RADIO: I currently host or co-host four weekly radio shows: one is on a local AM station and three are strictly Internet productions. You can tune in to Ministry Beat on Tuesdays at 4PM, Urban Heroes on Wednesday at 8AM, Leadership Talk on Friday at 4PM and Wake Up to Purpose at 8AM on Saturday morning on WPIT-730AM (you can listen to this online or using the WPIT mobile app anywhere in the world; archived shows are available on my website). If you cannot listen live (and most can't) all these shows are placed in an archive, which you can access at your convenience on the link provided.

MESSAGES: You can listen to or watch messages I have spoken at my local church on the church's website or other messages in my own website archives.

BOOKS: I currently have 20 books in publication, three of which are devotionals published this year. The devotionals make a great gift to yourself or others, for they keep on giving every day of the year! You can see all my books on Amazon and most are available in paper or Kindle versions. The three new devotionals are A String of Pearls: Wisdom for Productive People, A Daily Taste of Proverbs and What Would Jesus Ask You Today? 

PURPOSECOACH: I am available for one-on-one purpose mentoring, personality assessments, 360-degree profiles and creativity coaching. I am also available to speak or consult with your company or organization around the topics of purpose, team building, leadership development and strategic planning.

THE PACIFIC INSTITUTE: I am a certified facilitator for the cognitive learning programs offered through The Pacific Institute, a world leader in personal development and leadership training.

TELEVISION: I am currently launching a new television show called Your PurposeQuest. This is a show designed to help you find purpose through the stories of my guests. The show can be seen locally on the Pittsburgh Community Channel. Never fear, however, if you cannot get that channel. Just go to my Vimeo channel and you can watch it any time from anywhere in the world.

WEBSITE: My website, PurposeQuest, is chock full of tools to help you find your purpose. Go there to take a purpose assessment and to see all the latest resources to help you be a person of purpose.

DAILY DEVOTIONAL: I write every day and post it for your devotional enjoyment and spiritual growth. This year's devotional is The Leadership Walk. You can subscribe to receive it every day or simply go there to check it out from time to time. I also post that daily devotional on Linkedin.

NEW TESTAMENT DEVOTIONAL: I have completed a verse-by-verse devotional of the entire New Testament, which is available on my Bible blog or on my website. I edit these on a regular basis and you can subscribe to receive those updates at the Bible blog site.

SOCIAL MEDIA: I have three Facebook pages - my personal page, one for my ministry PurposeQuest International and one called Feeding Widows and Orphans in Africa. My personal page is maxed out, but you can go to the other pages and register a 'like' so you can stay in touch with what's happening. I am also on Twitter at @johnstanko.

CONTRIBUTIONS: If you notice, most of what I listed above is free of charge. I seldom ask, but if you would like to contribute to my personal support and ministry, you can do so through my website or by sending a tax-deductible check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh, PA 15221-0882.

Thank you and I pray the Lord will use the resources and programs above to encourage and equip you for purposeful living.

651: Smelling Like a Rose

We have been studying Daniel the last few weeks and he is a fascinating study in purpose. Let's continue with that study this week, but please make sure you check out all my announcements and news at the very end.

As you already know, Daniel was taken from his home, sent to Babylon, promoted in Babylon, demoted in Babylon and then promoted again.  As we read last week:

Now Daniel so distinguished himself among the administrators and the satraps by his exceptional qualities that the king planned to set him over the whole kingdom.  At this, the administrators and the satraps tried to find grounds for charges against Daniel in his conduct of government affairs, but they were unable to do so. They could find no corruption in him, because he was trustworthy and neither corrupt nor negligent. Finally these men said, "We will never find any basis for charges against this man Daniel unless it has something to do with the law of his God" (Daniel 6:3-5).

This set the stage for Daniel's most dangerous trial when he was thrown to the lions. He spent the night so close to those lions that he also could smell their breath and they his. Yet even though Daniel spent the night with those lions, he came out smelling like a rose. 

THE KING

As it goes on in Daniel 6, those against Daniel had the king pass a law that outlawed any prayer to anyone except the king for a period of time. Of course, Daniel did not honor this law, but kept right on praying as was his custom. What's more, he did not hide the fact that he prayed, but rather did it publicly and openly.

When the king was confronted with this fact, he had no choice but to follow through with the punishment he had set. Daniel had to be thrown to the lions. 

So the king gave the order, and they brought Daniel and threw him into the lions' den. The king said to Daniel, "May your God, whom you serve continually, rescue you!"A stone was brought and placed over the mouth of the den, and the king sealed it with his own signet ring and with the rings of his nobles, so that Daniel's situation might not be changed. Then the king returned to his palace and spent the night without eating and without any entertainment being brought to him. And he could not sleep (Daniel 6:16-18).

Daniel was such a faithful and valuable employee and servant that the king could not eat or sleep, and actually prayed to Daniel's God for Daniel's protection. When is the last time your pagan boss lost any sleep over your well-being?  When has someone you have served prayed for your safety and protection?  Such was Daniel's value that his rivals hated him but the king loved and honored him.

THE MORNING AFTER

After a sleepless night, the king ran to Daniel's den:

At the first light of dawn, the king got up and hurried to the lions' den. When he came near the den, he called to Daniel in an anguished voice, "Daniel, servant of the living God, has your God, whom you serve continually, been able to rescue you from the lions?"Daniel answered, "O king, live forever! My God sent his angel, and he shut the mouths of the lions. They have not hurt me, because I was found innocent in his sight. Nor have I ever done any wrong before you, O king."The king was overjoyed and gave orders to lift Daniel out of the den. And when Daniel was lifted from the den, no wound was found on him, because he had trusted in his God (Daniel 6:19-23).

I want to be like Daniel when I grow up and come through every test like he did! I want to serve the king and be found innocent when charged with corruption!  It is never a surprise or coincidence when someone like Daniel succeeds and your success won't be a surprise either. If you know your purpose, serve faithfully and maintain your integrity, there isn't a king or lion in this world who can stop God from promoting you. If you are in your own lions' den as you read this, don't panic. God will protect and rescue you and, when He does, you will be even more effective than you were before. Have a great week as you serve God and mankind with excellence and integrity, and don't be surprised when you come out smelling like a rose no matter how severely you are tested!

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KENYA: I have some exciting updates from Kenya on my blog, plus the great news that our container with 17,000 pounds of resources will be picked up this coming Wednesday and arrive in Nairobi on June 8. After you read the updates, please act to help Pastor Francis and his children with a special Easter offering. You can give using PayPal through my website or by sending a tax-deductible check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh, PA 15221-0882.

UPCOMING SEMINAR IN BEAVER COUNTY: I am hosting a purpose seminar from 2PM to 4PM this coming Saturday at New Hope Community Church, 492 Beaver Avenue in Ambridge here in western Pennsylvania. The seminar is free but I need to know if you plan on attending.

UPCOMING SEMINAR IN PITTSBURGH: I am hosting my quarterly purpose profiling seminar in Pittsburgh (at right is a picture from the last one held in October, 2013) at Allegheny Center Alliance Church on Saturday, May 3 from noon to 4:30 PM. Once again, the seminar is free but you need to register by writing to let me know you are coming. If you can't make this one, the next one is on June 7 at the same time.

MISSIONS EVENT: I am speaking at the African Christian Fellowship fundraising luncheon at noon on Saturday, April 26 here in Pittsburgh at the Wyndham Hotel in Oakland. I was invited by my good friend Emmanuel Ike from Nigeria. Admission is free but, as always, you need to let me know you would like to come.

PURPOSE ASSESSMENT: Don't forget that there is a free purpose assessment on the home page of my website. Once you take the assessment, you will hear from me with your score and with suggestions for the way forward.

ONLINE RADIO: I now have three weekly Internet radio shows, to which you can listen live or access all of the archived interviews and download them to listen to on your mobile device or on your computer. The three shows are:

1. Leadership Talk: Friday at 4PM (U.S. Eastern Time Zone)
2. Urban Heroes: Wednesday at 8AM
3. Ministry Beat: Tuesday at 4PM

FACEBOOK: When you have a chance, please go to my Facebook ministry page and register a like so you can follow me there.

648: Tidbits

I got home from Kenya yesterday and just didn't have the energy or time to write the Memo, so here is the latest edition, albeit one day late. (No I will not rename it the Tuesday Memo.) I had a super trip to Kenya, as always, and you can read a short overview of my journey before you proceed to this week's outstanding Memo (I speak in faith).

I haven''t done a tidbits version of the Memo in some time, which includes some short insights into myself or my world, so let's do that this week:

1. I left my pastoral position January 31, but have had to be realistic with my expectations of what I would have time to do; my desires have exceeded the time available.
2. I have not left ministry; I am a purpose pastor to people the world over.
3. I am running ouf of time to learn to be patient; I will be 64 next month.
4. When I travel, I learn about myself; on this recent trip, I learned that I am called to speak to and develop leaders
5. The purpose message is relevant in Africa, even though people have limited options and resources; that is because when people have little control over anything else, they have some control over how they will express their purpose.
6. I will have three more books published by the end of April.
7. I know God wants me to start a publishing company to help others publish their projects; I am scared of the whole process.
8. I have consistently underestimated the power of the message God gave me to deliver; many in Kenya shared with me the changes in their lives after having heard me two years ago.
9. I need to aggressively seek venues where I can share my message, regardless of what anyone thinks.
10. I have not missed a day of writing in five years - not one day.
11. This question keeps resonating in my mind and heart: "What could I do today if I was not afraid?" You may want to ask yourelf the same question.
12. I love Africa; I love Kenya; I love Kenyans. If I was not afraid, I would go stay there for one month and see what doors the Lord opens for me.
13. I love to teach and I think my students like it when I teach too; when I teach, I feel God helping me.

That's about it for now. Thanks both for reading and for being part of my purpose world. I came home from this trip convinced of one thing: The best is yet to come. Have a great week!

646: The 5 Regrets of the Dying

A few years ago I found link to an article and shared it in Memo 535. It was written by an Australian woman, Bronnie Ware, who has devoted many hours to working with patients who were dying. Here is a summary of her journey that led to writing the essay:

After too many years of unfulfilling work, Bronnie Ware began searching for a job with heart. Despite having no formal qualifications or experience, she found herself working in palliative care. Over the years she spent tending to the needs of those who were dying, Bronnie's life was transformed. Later, she wrote an Internet blog about the most common regrets expressed to her by the people she had cared for. The article, also called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, gained so much momentum that it was read by more than three million people around the globe in its first year.

You can read the article in its entirety and also purchase the book that Bonnie has written on Amazon. Here I want to summarize the five points of her article and focus on one point in particular.

THE FIVE REGRETS

Here are the five regrets that Bronnie discovered in working with those patients close to death over the years:

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Here is what Ware had to say about the first point, the courage to be true to self and not others:

This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

DON'T LET IT BE YOUR REGRET

It takes courage to be true to yourself and who God created you to be. The last few weeks, we have looked at the life of King David. Before David went out to fight Goliath, King Saul tried to have David wear his (Saul's) battle armor. Saul was a tall man, however, and the armor didn't fit. David did not try and please the king. Instead he rejected the armor and took along his sling shot, something that was more true to who he was. His success of course is legendary (see 1 Samuel 17:38-40).

Are you wearing someone else's armor? If you are, then you are headed for the number one regret expressed by the dying. Don't do it! I cannot say what you should do, but I can only urge you to follow your heart and stop living your life for someone else, unless however it is for the Lord. I was challenged by this list and I hope you are, too. Now that you have read it, it's time to get about the work of living before it's too late. Have a great week!

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KENYA: I am in Kenya. You can read my latest update on my personal blog, or read and subscribe to my travel blog updates. Either way I ask you to follow along, and then pray and give as God directs you. The attached picture was taken by an orphan with my camera last Saturday. They love to take pictures and then view them right away. You can still give to help these children through my website or by sending a check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh PA, 15221-0882. Thank you for your generous support.

643 - What To Do With a Big Head

How do you react when you do something well?  What's more, how do you handle it when someone compliments you for something they admire about you? If you're like some, you may not know what to do in those situations. You don't want to appear proud or egocentric, so you actually may minimize your strengths and achievements in your eyes and in the eyes of others. This may seem spiritual or noble, but it's actually detrimental to your ongoing development and growth!

What should you do when you succeed or receive a compliment? I'm glad you asked. For the answer, however, you will have to read on.

A BIG HEAD

We have looked at the story of David and Goliath the last two weeks.  (If you didn't read or receive those Memos, you may want to go the site where they are posted and get caught up.) Last week, we saw how David made specific declarations of what he was about to do to Goliath. David made good on his promises and killed Goliath with one stone from his slingshot. It's what he did next that answers the questions I raised above.

David cut off Goliath's head! That was one big head not only to cut off but also to carry around.

The armies of Israel were encouraged by David's victory, and went forth to win a great victory over the Philistine army. That was one byproduct of David's success. Then David did something else that would be quite uncharacteristic for many I know"

David took the Philistine's head and brought it to Jerusalem, and he put the Philistine's weapons in his own tent (1 Samuel 17:54).

What did David do with the head? I doubt if he kept it in his tent or made a keychain out of it. He did what most champions did with such spoils of battle. David probably hung the head on a post for everyone to see. David celebrated his own victory and advertised his achievement! What's more, he kept a souvenir of the battle by keeping the giant's sword in his trophy case.

How does that answer the question of what to do when you achieve success? How does this give you insight into how you should respond when you receive a compliment?

DON'T WORRY THAT A BIG HEAD WILL GIVE YOU A BIG HEAD.

David celebrated his victory. He wanted people to see Goliath's head so that they would be encouraged to fight their own battles. As a good leader, David wanted the people to see that they didn't have to cower in fear. More importantly, David didn't minimize his success.  He didn't say, "Well, it was nothing.  You know, it was a lucky shot and God really did it, it wasn't me."

No.  David said, "Look what I've done.  What can you do? If this is what God helped me do, what will He help you do?"  That's what you need to do as well.

If someone compliments you on something you've done or for something you are, say, "Thank you." Don't push their praise away.

If you have done something and no one compliments you, then compliment yourself! Admire what you've done.Savor the moment, without being self-conscious or worrying about what others will think of you. If you achieve a goal for which you have worked hard, throw yourself a party and invite your friends to celebrate with you. Take a trip in honor of your new job, degree or completed project.

David knew how to celebrate his victories and use them to spur himself and others on to greater things.  You and I need to do the same. Don't worry about a big head; there will be enough tough knocks and challenges to keep your feet firmly planted in reality. When you do something great, however, don't be afraid to acknowledge that, well, that it was great! And if others acknowledge that as well, then it is all the better.

This whole process may help you see that you may not be afraid of failure, but afraid of success - of what you will do if and when you succeed! Can you handle success and the admiration of others? I hope you will learn to broadcast your victories rather than hide behind mediocrity so that no one is offended and you aren't uncomfortable. Aim for great things, do them and tell the world if others don't. Have a great week!

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KENYA UPDATE: My next trip to Kenya is three weeks away. I need your help so we can help as many as possible while we are there. Please read this latest post and then give generously and quickly, for time is growing short. You can give through my website or by sending a tax-deductible check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh, PA 15221-0882. Your gifts will help feed and educate a boy such as the one pictured here. Thank you in advance for your generous support.

MY RADIO: Did you know I upload all my Saturday radio shows to my website after they are completed? You can listen to any of them here. Also I have a slew of archived interviews from my Tuesday show Ministry Beat and others archived from my Friday show Leadership Talk. Soon I will start a new Wednesday show called Urban Heroes.

ALASKA CRUISE: I took a Caribbean cruise over New Year's and I am ready to take you on an Alaskan cruise this coming August! I think a cruise is the ideal vacation, with something for everyone to do whenever they want to do it. I am attaching the cruise brochure below - take a look and then put your deposit down on the vacation of a lifetime.

NEW DAILY DEVOTIONAL: This year I started a new daily devotional entitled The Leadership Walk. You can view it and sign up to receive it on my blog site. You can also read a quick overview of the format and objectives here.

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640: Fasting

I am in the midst of a 21-day water-only fast. Now I know I should not be telling you this, but I am not doing it to boast or gloat. I'm doing it to teach. It's been a tough road so far, but I am getting lots of sleep and trying to pace myself until I finish next weekend. I am not praying for anything specific, and I am not trying to 'move' God to do what I want Him to do. I am just positioning myself for the future, making myself available to hear and respond. And please don't worry, I think I have sufficient excess weight to carry me through an all-year fast.

Fasting is a lost discipline in many lives. What's more, there has been teaching that has relegated fasting to not watching television, a Daniel fast (vegetables and fruit only), giving up certain foods for a certain period of time, one-meal a day, and drinking enough juice, coffee and tea to hydrate an entire football team fast. At the end of the day, the technical meaning for fasting is to go without food.

Why is this discipline so important? There are obvious health reasons, but the main reason is spiritual. It's a time to consecrate yourself to the Lord and seek His face. It's a chance to mortify and deny your flesh, that is always screaming, "Feed me, notice me, take care of me." It's a time to break spiritual strongholds, and the list goes on and on. There are many benefits, so why don't we fast more?

Obviously, the pace of today's world makes it difficult to stop and change your lifestyle. Most work requires a lot of brainpower and fasting causes less sugar to go to the brain, causing some forgetfulness and sluggish thinking. But one of the main reasons is fear - we are afraid it will be too hard and we will not be able to sustain the commitment. Fear keeps us from proceeding but, when we do, we are often glad we did!

My first step in fasting is to first eliminate all caffeine and soda drinks. Then I ease into it with one meal a day, and then go total. As mentioned earlier, I try to nap in the afternoon and go to bed super early. After three days, you would be surprised that your energy kicks back in and you can carry on a pretty normal routine.

Is getting spirtual clarity worth missing nine meals in three days? If finding your purpose worth fifteen missed meals? Only you can answer that question. Even Jesus started His earthly ministry with a 40-day fast and immediately plunged into significant public ministry with great power and focus. Only He knows what role His fast played in His ministry, but it had to be significant. If Jesus fasted for results, shouldn't you?

When God calls or directs you to a fast, you can count on His help! So if this has been on your mind to take some time as the year begins to fast, I urge you to go for it, as long as there no medical reasons not to (a headache from sugar and caffeine withdrawal is not a medical reason). Do some research in the Bible, read some of the good content online about fasting and then do your best. That way we can be hungry together!  Thanks and have a great week ahead.

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KENYA UPDATE: I posted the latest info on the work in Kenya, including some pictures of little Mary as she returns to school today. You can read about it here and then give what you can toward my visit in February 27. You can give through my website or by sending a check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh, PA 15221-0882. Whatever you give will all go toward feeding widows and orphans when I go over in February.

TRAINING: I am sponsoring a Pacific Institute seminar this week, January 23 and 24 and February 20 and 21. This cognitive and social learning seminar changed my life in 2004 and it will change yours, too. There is still time and room for you to register. It is not free, but it is an investment in yourself that will pay dividends for many years to come. I will also host two four-hour purpose seminars here in Pittsburgh in April and May, 2014. Write me if you are intested and I will add you to a list to keep you informed of those dates when they become available.

ALASKA CRUISE: I took a Caribbean cruise over New Year's and I am ready to take you on an Alaskan cruise this coming August! I think a cruise is the ideal vacation, with something for everyone to do whenever they want to do it. I am attaching the cruise brochure below - take a look and then put your deposit down on the vacation of a lifetime.

NEW DAILY DEVOTIONAL: Two weeks ago I started a new daily devotional entitled The Leadership Walk. You can view it and sign up to receive it on my blog site. You can also read a quick overview of the format and objectives here.

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639: My Transition

A few weeks ago, I announced my resignation, effective January 31, after serving for five years as the administrative pastor at Allegheny Center Alliance Church. There were no relational or strategic problems. I plan on being involved there as a member and for special projects. Here is a portion of what I wrote in my resignation letter to the congregation:

I ask for your prayers as this decision is a faith decision. I am not interviewing nor do I intend to interview or do a job search. I am open to whatever the Lord may bring, but my intention at this time is to focus on the writing projects I have announced and discussed in many social media outlets, as well as the teaching and publishing opportunities that are before me.

What I did not write is that my plans include starting a publishing company, continuing my teaching and work at Geneva College, losing weight, exercising more and organizational and leadership consulting. I am exhilarated and scared at the same time, for I am 64 years of age in April, and the thoughts of starting over without the financial support of a job is a bit daunting at times.

Yet I must practice what I have taught and preached, and that is you and I must follow our heart and joy. I have sensed a transition was coming in my life for the last 18 months, and it became clear to me in November that I could not ignore what my heart (and the Lord) were saying any longer.

These last five years have been the best and most productive years of my life. I have few regrets and many great memories and learning experiences to add to my repertoire. My family will stay connected and worship at the church I have served. I am confident in God's plan and provision, and I don't think God is finished with me yet - or at least I hope not.

I trust my transitions challenges you in some ways. Are you stuck in your work life? Are you fighting your heart and yourself, trying to talk yourself out of what you sense? Are you afraid of the faith step that won't seem to leave you alone, that beckons you to take that first step of faith? If so, I hope my story and reports in the coming months will encourage and help you.

God has been faithful to me and I am putting my trust in Him, banking on the fact I have heard His voice and heeded His call. I am looking forward to the future with great anticipation. My thanks to my church and the staff for putting up with me as long as they did. Now it's time to do some new things. Thank you for your support, and I pray you have a purposeful and blessed week!

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TRAINING: I am sponsoring a Pacific Institute seminar on January 23 and 24 and February 20 and 21. This cognitive and social learning seminar changed my life in 2004 and it will change yours, too. If you would like information, please write me and I provide what you need. It is not free, but it is an investment in yourself that will pay dividends for many years to come. I will also host two four-hour purpose seminars here in Pittsburgh in April and May, 2014. Write me if you are intested and I will add you to a list to keep you informed of those dates when they become available.

ALASKA CRUISE: I just returned from a Caribbean cruise and I am ready to take you on an Alaskan cruise this coming August! I think a cruise is the ideal vacation, with something for everyone to do whenever they want to do it. I am attaching the cruise brochure below - take a look and then put your deposit down on the vacation of a lifetime.

NEW DAILY DEVOTIONAL: Last week I started a new daily devotional entitled The Leadership Walk. You can view it and sign up to receive it on my blog site. You can also read a quick overview of the format and objectives here.

Download Alaska Flier

638: Saving Mr. Stanko

My family went to see the Disney movie, Saving Mr. Banks, over the holidays. It is the beautifully-told story of P. L. Travers, the developer of the Mary Poppins character. The movie chronicles her childhood that helped shape the Mary Poppins story while Travers worked with Walt Disney to create the movie. Much of what Travers learned during her time in Hollywood was how her relationship with her father had shaped both the Poppins story and her own troubled adult life. We enjoyed the movie for the most part, although Emma Thompson's depiction of Travers was a bit disconcerting as she depicted her rudeness toward others.

I woke up the next morning and realized I had never written much about my father. My mother was the one with the most colorful sayings and I inherited many of her family’s characteristics, traits and tendencies. Yet no one shaped my adult work and life philosophy more than my father, who passed away in 1996. So while I have founded the Sophia Fund to honor my mother’s memory, today I will do what Travers did and reminisce to clarify my father’s legacy and role in my life.

My dad was a gifted man, who could fix anything. People trusted him and confided their secrets to him, some of which he carried to his grave. He worked hard, but never received much financial return for his work. He took me to my first baseball game - and you know I love baseball - and to my first hockey game - and hockey has remained a favorite for 50 years! He worked long hours, but when he took his annual vacation, we always did cool stuff, or at least stuff we never did any other time of the year. When I was 10, he took me to the Pittsburgh Airport, just to look around. I was so impacted that to this day, I cannot enter an airport without feeling the same exhilaration I felt that night with him when I watched the planes land and depart.

I remember that my father was a fearful man, and my mother was more fearful than he was - so that reinforced his own fears. He longed for excitement, but had little. He wanted to travel - and did go off to World War II - but never went much of anywhere once he returned. He wanted to spend money and take risks, but never seemed to get up the nerve to do either. I have often said when we buried him, we needed a host of men to lift his casket. It was not that he was heavy; we just loaded all his regrets into the casket with him and that made it too heavy for the men to hoist.

When reflecting on the movie, I think I realized for the first time that I have lived my adult life trying to vindicate my father, or if not to vindicate, at least to go where he feared to tread. I determined I would not live a life of regrets, but would do what was in my heart to do now, today. I have had to deal with my own fears - who doesn’t? - and I still have a ways to go. I watched him, however, and decided I would not die with the best of me still in me. He encouraged me to live life and go for it, even when he could not. I think he would be pleased with my life so far.

So this Monday Memo is my feeble attempt at Saving Mr. Stanko. Obviously the saving is not for him, but for me - for me to grow and realize a little more of who I am and why I do what I do. And for that I am grateful to the movie for stirring this in me, but mostly to my father, John Stanko, Sr., who gave me a way to live that he could not. Thanks, dad, and may I represent you well in the days I have remaining on earth.

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KENYA: A nice batch of contributions came in over the holidays, and I haven’t even added it all up since my wife and I were away on a cruise. I depart February 27 for Kenya and still need resources to ship and distribute our container goods, along with food for the orphans and work equipment for the widows. You can give through my website or by sending a tax-deductible check to PurposeQuest, PO Box 8882, Pittsburgh, PA 15221-0882. You can read my latest blog update that is a thank you from Pastor Peter if you need any further idea what your support means to the Kenyan people.

TRAINING: I am sponsoring a Pacific Institute seminar on January 23 and 24 and February 20 and 21. This cognitive and social learning seminar changed my life in 2004 and it will change yours, too. If you would like information, please write me and I provide what you need. It is not free, but it is an investment in yourself that will pay dividends for many years to come.

ALASKA CRUISE: I am just returning from a cruise to the Caribbean and I am ready to take you on an Alaskan cruise! I think a cruise is the ideal vacation, with something for everyone to do whenever they want to do it. I am attaching the cruise brochure below - take a look and then put your deposit down on the vacation of a lifetime.

NEW DAILY DEVOTIONAL: Today I start a new daily devotional entitled The Leadership Walk. You can view it and sign up to receive it on my blog site. You can also read a quick overview of the format and objectives here.

Download Alaska Flier